|Top & Pants: J. Crew, Shoes: Seychelles, Bag: Kate Spade|
Recently, I have been thinking about going back to work full time in the corporate world. But, God is telling me otherwise, and I still struggle not to challenge Him.
My oldest son will be starting his senior year, our 11 year old is starting middle school, our 5 year old will be starting kindergarten, and finally our 3 year old will be in pre-school. What was I thinking?
Honestly, I think I wanted to run from it all. The responsibility of being a stay at home mom, the full time duty of playing peacemaker, chef, activities coordinator, personal shopper, stylist, and snack lady. Going back to work full time would be a break for me. I know this sounds ungrateful, but I am just being real. Some days it is all I can do to keep my cool. I LOVE my kids, but days like today make me want to break down and sob. (Matter of fact, I just did.)
Dealing with accidents, injuries, fights, messes, animals, etc is not at all glamourous. But God gave me four children, and they must come first. I tell myself I can do it all, but maybe I can't. I have to accept the fact that the kids are my priority, and lean on Him to give me the strength to keep it together, even when I want to run. That is just going to have to be enough!